A simple "Primer" on Gender Differences

Way back when, before my Mom passed away my last blog topic was "Gender Wars".  At the time I had a whole "plan" on how I would approach a topic that I had some strong feelings about but was having a difficult time approaching. You see I have a wife and a daughter-in-law that I love dearly.  I also have some very strong feelings about some of the changes our western society has been going through since the birth of the "Modern" feminist' movement.

Now do not get me wrong, many of the changes brought about by the feminist (and the equal rights movement) were overdue in a society that relishes freedom for all human beings to follow their dreams, hopes and desires.  Anyone who believes in economic, political and religious freedom etc. can appreciate that opportunities for all humans to pursue their dreams need to be fair and equally shared among all members of society.  Turning back to clock to a time where only a part of society was free to pursue opportunities is not an option if you believe in the concept everyone's  right to pursue happiness.

So why talk about "Gender Wars" ?  Well as a person who also believes in "science" and who has a background in "Anthropology" I also remain convinced that there are certain biological and social truths in the evolution of humankind that cannot be easily written off. I had planned to launch into some topics on the nuclear family and reasonable gender based physical and emotional differences that raise caution flags in our explosion of expanding equal rights battles but have decided to start by a simple primer based on some observations from personal experiences and solicit responses from my readers on not only my comments but from their own experiences.

Humans, male and female are remarkably complex creatures.  My faithful and obedient companion for example is very complex.  I often cite her ability to remember names, events and incidents as an example on why the female of our species were gatherers rather than hunters.  She can remember people, places and things long forgotten in my brain and I will prove it by citing a few examples.

First the "people thing".  Two days ago we were riding a lift with two (a male and a female) people who were ski instructors at Winter Park.  As always we struck up a nice conversation (we find one of the joys of skiing is striking up a casual chat with strangers on a lift-it is so much better than then the dead silence on an elevator).  As we chatted about teaching kids how to ski etc. we wandered into the usual "where you from" conversation.  About 2 minutes later after one of the instructors mentioned he used to ski at Blue Mountain in Pennsylvania my faithful and obedient companion blurts out.....your Mike aren't you.  Startled I thought "WTF"  "Mike" turned to Barbara and said "Yes how did you know?"  She replied "you gave us 8 hours of ski instruction 4 years ago when we first visited Winter Park".

Now I had not forgotten we took a couple of lessons at Winter  Park but would I ever remember the guys name?  Not in a Million Years.  He was startled as well but the next day he sent me an email, obviously by searching his records from years back.

Now this reminded me how Barbara has a knack for remembering what I see as obscure memories.  A couple of years ago when visiting her sister Maria in Pennsylvania we went to dinner at a local restaurant where the waitress while taking our order was shocked when Barbara addressed here as "Jamie" (She did not have a name tag).  You see she had apparently waited on us several  years before...and had struck up a conversation about her name, and we called our son Jamie for years until he switched to "James".  (As an appropriate aside on the topic of gender-this name switch made my Father very happy because he had hated us calling him Jamie as he thought it was to "gender neutral").  Anyway I was amazed at Barbara's powers of recall.

I should confess that I understood her talents for years.  When I ran a division at AIG I had an annual meeting with about 80-100 insurance brokers who sold our product and I was the only Division head who included spouses at such meetings, frankly for a very selfish reason.  At our first night reception she and I would greet our guests with her always going first because she could remember not only the brokers names, but their spouses, and even kids names from year to year.

Now if it were just names that might be one thing, but incidents (yes good and bad), faces and places all remain firmly in her grasp.  I know some of my readers may scoff at this but I am convinced this is a genetic trait unique to the females of our species!  I always tell her it is why women were gatherers, they remembered where to find the best berries, herbs etc.  Men are programmed to wander around searching for Woolly Mammoths and stuff.  Heck I wander every day looking for my glasses.


So readers am I full of BS or a perceptive observer of gender differences?  If you do not agree please tell me where I am wrong.  However, I am also asking  all of you if you have any such observations of your own?



Until next time
Adieu.